i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Enjoy the penises
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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