Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
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