I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
