I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize
