I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
