my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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