This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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