your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
