You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
