I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
