there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
