She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
