How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize