i need an iv and a liver transplant
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize