I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
