i just wanna soil my oats bro
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i came on her dog
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
