Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
