you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
