Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
