we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
