What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Randomize