we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
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