I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
