listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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