What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
