After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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