Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Randomize
