In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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