: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I want to be your penis for a week.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
he just fucked me for my cheese..
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
soo... how was my night?
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