Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
