Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
