when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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