i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
