If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
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