i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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