you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
where am i from again
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
