Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
