My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
