Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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