You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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