It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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