is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Randomize