how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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