I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
