Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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