omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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