Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
