Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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