There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
