Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
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